Tricky to navigate stairs through all the tears

I don't have any qualms about using these blogs to make random references to TV favorites. However, I do try to avoid peddling any type of product or recommendation. Either way, I will take the time to tell anyone reading this to go see "Seven Pounds."

This is one of the best written movies I have ever seen. Character motivation, development and plot begin as a scrambled pile of puzzle pieces.

Based on what I have read, don't trust the reviews of this movie. People complain that the mystery is too thick, the segments too disjointed. I disagree entirely. I think Seven Pounds does what many movies fail to: respects the audience. You may find yourself predicting the end of this movie early on. Even if you do, it will not take away from the powerful climax or poignant last scene.

The Economy - It Tastes Like Burning!

Analysts may have all of their fancy charts and doomsday predictions, but in the Workman house, the economy can be evaluated by the quantity of canned meats consumed. Times have apparently been grim since I first tasted Spam with Bacon!

Processed bricks of meat aren't all fun and games. Sure, it is exciting to slice it up after watching it slide out of the can. You don't know if the congealed bubble of saturated fat you're bound to discover will be the size of a dime or a golf ball. It's like a prize in a box of Cracker Jacks! That is, I suppose, if Cracker Jacks started giving away heart attacks.

Even the way the meat reveals itself is exciting. I did some extensive testing and realized that Spam drops from the can at the same speed as the New Year's countdown ball.

"Yay! Here I am!! You're poor!" says the Spam after sticking its landing on your plate.

You can try to jazz it up, but adding eggs and A1 won't make your Spam fancy. Pretend you're eating steak all you want; in your heart you know that "rib-eye" you're noisily masticating came from a blender.

My denial finally gave way to acceptance when I pushed away from the table while trying to roll Spam into seaweed and rice. I sobbed uncontrollably into my greasy palms. I had just dragged my beloved Sushi into an alley, beaten and raped it.

Sushi: I will spend the rest of my days (as long as I can chew solid food, at least) giving you the treatment you deserve. I will never take you for granted again.

Women who make poor choices with men must face the lonely walk of shame in the morning. Men who make poor choices with low-grade pseudo-meats must also deal with the consequences after the next dawn breaks. In the words of the brilliant Brian Regan, "It seems like everything on my insides wants to be on my outsides!"

Regretful and ashamed, you are forced to stand on the train platform early in the morning and ask yourself the tough questions:

"Its only 23 degrees. If I let this fart out, will it steam?"

Lunch consists of Saltines and Vienna Sausages. You bite into perhaps your 100th of the year and catch yourself thinking, "If Spam pooped, I bet it would look like this."

And now, 12 hours later, you ride the train home longing to get out to the platform. Cold or warm, the pressure valve must be purged. Your intestines seem as angry at Spam as you are at them.

Then, as the realization washes over you, a single tear escapes the clutches of your eyelid. You can't wait to get home. You're going straight to the stove to crank it to MED-HI. You're going to take out that fracking Spam pan, aren't you? You are! You can't wait to peel back that shiny gold lid! You're addicted, Buddy!

Forget Big-Tobacco and Big-Oil! Let us raise our fists and revolt against the processed meat conglomerates! Damn you Hormel! Damn you and your delicious Spam!!

Home (The Dangerous Summer)

TAGGED!! Well, not me personally... but a freind I know. You can imagine what it'd be like if I did! Huh? Huh?

Did you pick up the genius of the late and loved Chris Farley in Billy Madison? I hope so.

I saw this on Melissa's blog and thought it was pretty cool because it uses songs like "I Ching" Chinese fortune-telling coins. Okay... not really, but it is fun to search for meaning where none actually exists. Don't we do this all the time?

The rules: Go to the shuffle setting on your MP3 player. Answer each question with title of the next song that comes up. No skipping, even if it doesn't make sense!

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?

Mother Father (Dave Matthews Band)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?

Kotov Syndrome (Rise Against)

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?

Thick As Thieves (Dashboard Confessional)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?

Broken Hearts and Concrete Floors (Dashboard Confessional)
*** Wow. Dark.***

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?

Back Breaker (Hit The Lights)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?

Who Is Aliandra (Park)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?

What Would You Say (Dave Matthews Band)

WHAT IS 2+2?

I'm Real (The Starting Line)

***I would have said, "CHICKEN!!" for all you Brian Regan fans!***

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?

Playing For Keeps (Matchbook Romance)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

Goin' Out West (Fight Club Soundtrack)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?

Wasting Time (RED)
*** I really, REALLY wish that one didn't come up!***

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

Whatever Tomorrow Brings (Incubus)
*** This is getting SPOOKY!***

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?

Save Us (Cartel)

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

Black hole Sun (Copeland - Punk Goes 90's)

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?

The Trophy Wife (Park)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?

The Grim Goodbye (The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?

The Greatest Fall (Of All Time) *** Actual Title!*** (Matchbook Romance)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?]

Papercut (Linkin Park)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?

Light in August - Chapter 9 (William Faulkner)

WHATS THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?

On Writing - Disc 8 (Stephen King)

HOW WILL YOU DIE?

4AM Forever (Lostprophets)
*** Probably better for the last one...***

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?

Eight of Nine (The Ataris)

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?

Ocean And Atlantic (Mayday Parade)

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?

What You Are (Dave Matthews Band)
*** Who knew I had so much DMB on this thing?!***

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?

Matter of Time (Cartel)

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?

The Ransom (Cartel)

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?

Love Seat (The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus)

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?

Memory (Sugarcult)

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?

Broken Legs (Moneen)
***No Way!!***

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?

Home (The Dangerous Summer)

What I learned from this game: DMB is taking up WAY too much of my iPod space!

Note from Melissa:

"Be forwarned if you play: There is a slight urge to make these songs mean something. And when it doesn't make sense, you will be tempted to skip to the next song...There is a LOT of cleaning up I need to do. So much music to weed through and get rid of.
TAG, You're IT! (If you want)"